Finding my way

As I go back and read the few entries I wrote before I abandoned this blog, I see a recurring theme. I am so over myself. I whine far too much.

Tomorrow will be the day I blog it all out and get it out of my system.

I so miss writing. I miss putting it all out there and getting an understanding from the words. My head is all crowded with all the things I "can't" say on the other blog. Truth be told, there are things I won't say here either, but for different reasons. You scare easily and we are in a good place right now, so I am going to keep a few walls about halfway up for the moment.

I did miss you today. Thursdays are quickly becoming my least favorite day of the week because I know you need to sleep to get ready to head back to work. You spoil me on Tuesdays and Wednesdays. I need to learn to live with disappointment.

I had a great talk with my mom. Funny, once I let her in on my big "secret" we have really opened up even more. Who would have thought that you would be the subject that brought us even closer together? Okay, not so much you personally, but the fact that I was able to open up to her and be vulnerable and not worry what she might say or do. That is huge for me. It feels good to have my mom in my life. I would say back in my life, but my mom and I have never had this type of relationship, so it is all new.

I am working really hard to do the whole "one day at a time" thing. You know me, I am a planner, but so far so good. I am going to get where I need to be one step at a time and I don't need to have this whole big FIVE YEAR PLAN in place...the next five hours are more than enough. (Yeah, I am making fun of you...it's what I do best).

So, for those that I just sent this link to...welcome to the rest of my life. I have hidden this blog pretty well, so I feel fairly confident about writing without reserve. I just ask that you not mention the name of this blog on Momaroo. Facebook is safe and I will be posting my link there from time to time, but never on Xanga.

Thanks guys...hope you aren't bored out of your mind.